Puyang Visit Next Week!

Posted On: Saturday, October 8th, 2011 at 9:17 am

[Written October 8, 2011.  Published November 10, 2011.]

So excited!  We have made plans for our first family vacation here in China!  We promised Jasmine that we would visit Puyang in September.  Well, September was a little busy, but we’re happy to say we’ll be heading there on Sunday!  We’re taking the train to Zhengzhou, doing a little touring around the province.  And then we’ll visit the orphanage with another couple on Wednesday or Thursday!  She is sooo excited to see her friends and ayis and has been counting down the days.  We are really excited too!

It’s funny how life takes little unexpected twists.

Pu Min Yu when we met him last year. A sweet but solemn face.

When Todd asked me who our son was (see previous post) he mentioned a boy we’d met before when we visited the orphanage last year.  Well, I’ve pulled out some of the pictures from the orphanage for Jasmine so she could remember names and faces before we go.  I was asking her the names of everyone, and remembered the last boy we had met during our visit.  I showed her the picture of him on our blog and asked a little about him.  She said, “Oh, the one with 3 fingers.  That’s Pu Min Yu.”

I hardly remembered that I had been brave enough to write any of my feelings about him in that post, but I had been, and I read it again.  (The funny thing is, I only wrote a tenth of what I felt when I saw him.)  I remember hoping he would find a family, and almost wishing that we could adopt him.  But I knew we couldn’t since we had just adopted a daughter 2 days before!  And limb differences…that was not a special need I felt prepared for.  It scared me.  Anyway, when I reread that I realized that my heart had been touched by those older waiting boys…and it started with him.

I feel like we have come full circle to where this began.  We are both very sure that we have found our son!  Nevertheless, the last several days have been very emotional.  I went from thinking I wasn’t prepared for a child with limb differences, to realizing that I want this child in my family more than anything!  I have been guarding my heart all week because of several very likely possibilities, which Todd was also aware of.  It is possible that…

  • he has been adopted already (it was over a year ago that we saw him)
  • he is already matched with a family
  • he is waiting on the shared list and will be matched with another family before we can even get our paperwork ready
  • he doesn’t want to be adopted.

Realistically, if he wasn’t already adopted, it was probably because he didn’t want to be, and we knew this.  (This is not unheard of with older children.  It can be scary to leave everything you know and start over in a foreign land with strangers!)  So last night when one of the ayis texted us to say it was okay to come visit the orphanage next week (yea!) Todd said, “Here’s our chance.  Do you want me to ask about Pu Min Yu?”  Uh…I couldn’t think of what to say!  So Todd just typed, “Last year we met a boy named Pu Min Yu.  Is he still there?”

Well, we waited for about 10 minutes (that felt like an hour) and got a reply.  Todd read it, and then began laughing hysterically.  Of course it was in Chinese, so I had no idea what it said.  He just kept saying how hilarious it was, and laughed and laughed.  And I was dying to know!  And he wouldn’t tell me!!!  And I was pretty sure it said something about this boy’s new family.  Maybe they’d be there next week at the same time as us, or they were coming soon.  Well, Todd continued laughing, and I started fighting back tears, because I realized he wouldn’t be ours.  Then I began reprimanding myself.  Why couldn’t I just be happy that he had a family??  Well, because I wanted him in MY family!  But I continued to fight the tears (didn’t want Todd to see them) and begged him to tell me what the text said.  He read (translated from Chinese of course),

He’s still here.  Do you have friends that want to adopt him?  He really wants to be adopted by a family.  He’s very smart, has good self-care ability, studies well.  If you have a friend that would like to adopt him let me know.”

The abrupt change in emotions, from bitter disappointment to overwhelming gratitude and renewed hope, was too much for my tear ducts to handle.  We knew we wanted him to be our son, and now we knew it was possible!  I cried.  Tears of joy, and gratitude.

Well, we didn’t tell the orphanage our desire since we still have several hurdles to cross before we’ll know for sure if we can bring him home.  But, the ayi said she would arrange for us to spend some time getting to know Pu Min Yu while we are there!  AWESOME!  We already feel so good about him, and are pretty certain he is our son.  We feel that after our visit next week we will be able to know with 100% certainty that he is ours.  I can hardly wait to meet this boy!!!  (Yes, we saw him once last year for a moment, and it was enough to momentarily stop my heart, but we didn’t have a chance to speak with him at all.)  I hope it won’t be too hard for Todd and I to act “normal” when we’re there.  We really don’t feel like we should tell anyone (him, ayis, our kids) since we’re not sure we’ll be able to make everything happen like we want.  It would be terrible to get everyone’s hopes up, especially his, only to have things not work out.  So, we’ll be praying that everything goes well next week, and that we can somehow make this work!


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One Response to “Puyang Visit Next Week!”

  1. Kate Ediger says:

    Jill & Todd, you are saints, you really are! This post made me cry. I pray that it can all work out for you and Pu Min Yu!! I will be honest, when I read the first post on wanting to adopt again, I thought you were crazy, but you already have 5 kids, you’ve proven crazy works. 🙂 There are certain people who don’t have the love to give to one child and then there are people who are overflowing with love and can make so many children feel as loved as if they were the only child. You are 2 of those people!! May God Bless your quest to share your love!


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