Praying for a(nother) miracle

Posted On: Thursday, August 12th, 2010 at 11:21 pm

This is a post I began this morning, but wasn’t quite able to finish…

I’m so greedy. We have experienced miracle after miracle since we began this process 13 months ago. And I am incredibly grateful for each one. As if they are not enough, I find myself asking for another miracle today (and trying not to cry in front of the kids).

Did I mention our last miracle??? A few weeks ago Todd’s work asked him travel to Taiwan at the end of August. He said there was about a 50/50 chance of it actually happening, but as soon as he mentioned it I REALLY felt that it was going to happen. Sure enough, he’s going to the right place at EXACTLY the right time! Why is this a miracle?  The company will pay the cost of a round-trip ticket to Taiwan, and we will only end up paying the few hundred extra to get him to Beijing and back. It basically saves us the cost of a $1000+ ticket!

About our potential travel dates. If we don’t leave by August 25th we will have to postpone until mid-October because of Wood Badge and Chinese holidays. Over the course of a month or so I have been praying daily about traveling in August, as opposed to October. Here are the reasons why:

  • easier for Kaylee Ann to miss school at the beginning of the year, rather than the middle during major projects
  • easier to miss home schooling Trevin at the beginning of the year, rather than during major project time
  • Jiao Jiao can be with her family sooner, and doesn’t have to stay in the orphanage longer
  • we will save $1000 because Todd is already traveling to Taiwan
  • hotels will be about $70-$100/night LESS because there are no major events happening in China
  • Spencer won’t start preschool until after we get home (one less kid for someone to have to drive around)
  • etc. etc. etc.
  • Over the last month or so, families were receiving travel approvals 14-17 days after Article 5. We have now been waiting 21 days. Have I mentioned that if we don’t travel by August 25th we will have to postpone our travel until October???  Just checking.

    Right now, I think we will get our TA in time, but I’m afraid we will not get the consulate appointment we need.  They have been booking up very early.  To confirm my fears, I emailed the consulate last night and received their reply early this morning:

    Thank you for your email.  The dates/September 7th and 8th, 2010 your request are already fully booked.  The earliest available after 9/8 is 9/13/2010.   We hope you find the information useful.

    It was just after 6am when I read this–and cried.  I went back to bed and laid awake, numb.  I didn’t know how to feel.  I had had so much faith and had prayed so hard and did everything I could.  It feels so right, and I can’t wrap my head around all these hopes and desires being taken away.  I want to hold out hope for one more miracle.

    I never finished the post.  And instead I decided to vent to one of my favorite adoption groups.  Here is the email I sent out to the group…)

    Is this a good time and place to vent?  If not, please disregard this email because it is nothing more than a pathetic pity party. 🙂

    We are on day 21 of the TA wait, with no TA in sight.  I received an email this morning stating that the CAs for Sep. 7th and 8th are full.  Of course, those are the dates we needed to avoid having to postpone until October.  (I’ve mentioned a billion times before–we have unalterable commitments in September that we have known about since August 09.)  Hoping for a miracle, otherwise we will not be traveling until October.  That email dashed every scrap of hope I’d been so desperately hanging on to for months.  We’re so close…and yet so far now.  This is so awful to say, but I think even if our TA did come in the next few days, I would have a really hard time being excited about it.  I can’t seem to find a reason to be too happy about our daughter sitting in an orphanage for 2 more months.

    And this is so dangerous, but I keep doing the “what-ifs.”  IF the consulate had been open on Monday, July 5th, or IF they had delivered our article 5 the following day instead of waiting until Thursday, we would have gotten our TA a week or more ago.  Yuck.  I’m in such a yucky place.

    No need to reply to this.  Just had to share with someone who might understand.  Thanks everyone.  And I promise the next time I post to this list it will be happy.  (Maybe if I put a bunch of smiley faces at the end of this email it will help.)

    🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

    Phew…that’s better.

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